A Special Pirate Tharrsday Edition of DVBlusday!

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides
Directed by Rob Marshal

“It’s a Pirate’s life for me. Savvy?”

Johnny Depp is back as the irrepressible Captain Jack Sparrow, returning for more booty, rum, and strange adventure in this fourth installment in the billion dollar franchise, although for a film with “Pirates of the Caribbean” in the title, maybe they could have spent a little more time in the Caribbean.

The story is loosely based on the wholly unremarkable novel, On Stranger Tides by Tim Powers, and finds Captain Jack meeting up with an ex-hoochie named Angelica, (Penelope Cruz) the daughter of the Pirate All Pirates Fear, the legendary Blackbeard himself (played with awesome scene-chewery, by Ian McShane). Soon Captain Jack finds himself once again in search of the Fountain of Youth (remember the last scenes in At World’s End? Well apparently the first search didn’t go so well as a short throwaway line attests), with the help of First Mate Gibbs (Kevin McNally), and returning fan-favorite Hector Barbossa, complete with rum-filled peg leg (played once again by the brilliant Geoffrey Rush).

A tighter story this time around, as well as fewer peripheral characters taking focus away from the mains does the flick good, however Jack’s ship the Black Pearl, a character unto itself, is conspicuous by its absence and only makes a “tiny” cameo as a ship in a bottle… who knows maybe she’ll be back in all her glory in the next flick. There seems top be a lot less sea-faring adventure in this flick than in previous ones, as the characters spend most of the film on dry land!

Be that as it may the flick is still a fun Piratical romp, Johnny Depp still rules the Pirate world with his portrayal of Captain Jack, the action is wonderfully over the top, and even Hans Zimmer’s overly loud and massively bombastic score, and Rob Marshal's mediocre directing didn’t manage to annoy me too much. I dug the flick and laugh in the faces of other “mainstream” reviewers like Ebert, who hated Dead Man’s Chest and At World’s End claiming the stories were “too complex” for his popcorn-butter addled mind, but then bashes On Stranger Tides for not being complex enough! Ah well, all it proves is that you can’t please everyone, and admittedly this film isn’t for everyone anyway, but if you dig Pirates in general, and the misadventures of Captain Jack Sparrow in particular, then I absolutely recommend this flick.

Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides gets FOUR rum-soaked hearties out of FIVE.


Danpersand said...

Wow. So another insipid Hollywood sequel to a sequel sends the rabid faux-buccaneer fanboy crowd into a tizzy. Pirate-obsessed geek culture of course being the flavour of the month. Too bad that month is November 2004.

One assumes they don't even need to make an actual movie next time. Just have the obedient masses enter the darkened theatre where a Disney executive knees you in the balls and takes your wallet with a hearty pirate growl, promptly showing you the exit.

At least we would be spared the pathetic sight of former artist/actor Johnny Depp doing his sad corporate monkey dance yet again.

Any reviewer that constantly bemoans the sorry, redundant state of movie making these days, and then shells out good money (any money, actually) to further encourage the practice, should be forced to eat a platter of barbequed elephant dick.

I give this flick review one smelly Jack Sparrow dreadlock out of nine.


The Jaeger said...

Yes Danny, but you HATE EVERYTHING, and didn't even SEE the flick, so your review of the review gets a HALF a smelly dreadlock, out of a million!

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