Snakes on a Plane
Directed by David R. Ellis
I am often heard going on, at length, about what is wrong with Hollywood today: boring faux-historical epics, the gross over-use of CG elements that do nothing to further the story, Spielberg coming this close with War of the Worlds, then having the whiny teenager live in the end. Come on, you all wanted him to die! Admit it!
Anyway, when I first heard about Snakes on a Plane I thought; cheesy schlockfest! I’m in! So Sunday I headed over to the Chinook theatre and with buttery popcorn that cost me, like, $6.75 (and it was a medium, and I couldn’t finish it!), sat down and watched me some motherfucking Snakes on a motherfucking Plane.
I’m glad I did. Now this may be premature of me to say this, but this very well might be Jaeger’s Fave Flick of the Year™.
Do not get me wrong, this flick will win NO OSCARS, and Rex Reid probably thinks it sucks, and walked out of the theatre like the wining fucking baby he is, but make no mistake: this flick Rocks all sorts of Roll.
From the opening scenes, anyone with half a brain can figure out exactly how this flick is going to end, but that doesn’t matter. It’s called Snakes on a Plane, and that is what it delivers: A big-ass, heavy jumbo jet airplane with a shitload of snakes on it going all apeshit (or is it snakeshit?) all over many fleeing, screaming, filthy human worm-babies, and Samuel L. Freaking Jackson kicking ass and taking names.
If you expect Citizen Cane from a flick called Snakes on a Plane, then you are a retard! Or a film student, maybe both.
4 out of 5 stars.
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